Sunday, March 14, 2010

2.5 Kiddos


For eight days I've been babysitting my 8 month old nephew, Lincoln, while his parents vacation in Costa Rica. My mom pointed out I am caring for four people 24/7: me, Anderson, Lincoln & fetus. That’s a lot.

Some days I was Supermom. We successfully tackled the park, playgroup, Costco, the library and McDonalds. (Confession to Cheryl: Lincoln may or may not have had and LOVED his first french fry.) I got the kids to nap at the same time, which was amazing. These were great days.

Unfortunately these days were in the minority. I think there were two of them. Most days I just wanted to die. I believe I can handle two children. But this particular experience has been one of those rains-then-pours weeks. You know, the weeks where all kinds of crazy, unusual, BAD things hit the fan all at once. It's also the week Harley is super stressed and extra busy at work and school. One of those weeks.

Our lowlights include but are not limited to:

*Eye infection manifesting in thick, green goop: Lincoln.

*Eye infection (viral conjunctivitis?) manifesting in thick, green goop followed by one eye puffing up and half shutting: Anderson.

*Constipation: Lincoln.

*Making up for constipation with 5 poopy diapers in 12 hours: Lincoln.

*Pooping in the tub: Anderson.

*Bleeding diaper rash: Lincoln.

*Violent vomiting in the middle of the night. For two nights: Anderson.

*Jealousy resulting in hitting and many time outs: Anderson.

*Night waking (and crying): Lincoln.

*3AM move to our bed: Lincoln.

*3AM move to the couch: Harley.

*Two “pee-pees” on the carpet: Anderson. (No we are not potty training. We’ve just been a little slow getting everyone dressed after baths.)

*Third head cold in 6 weeks: Me.

*Loss of voice: Me.

*Jar of baby food shattered. Glass and pureed wild Alaskan salmon everywhere: Anderson (while trying to feed Lincoln).

*What I believe to be the beginning of Braxton Hicks contractions: Me.

*Afternoon nap REFUSAL: Lincoln.

*Afternoon CRANKINESS: Lincoln.

*Hundreds of cell phone minutes spent freaking out to my mom: Me.

*Learning to climb into the crib, meaning it's only a short matter of time before he learns to climb OUT of the crib: Anderson.

*An entire bowl of fabulous cocoa pebbles doused in whole milk dumped EVERYWHERE on EVERYONE minutes after baths: Lincoln.

*Only 3 showers: Me.

*Countless viewings of Sesame Street DVDs: Everyone.

*11 loads of laundry: Me

*Waking others up: Anderson and Lincoln.

*Not enough sleep: Everyone.

*Unexpectedly quitting the pacifier: Lincoln. (Gasp! Harley and I are 100% untrained in this. I’m serious when I tell you we really don’t have this problem with Anderson. HOW do you calm a baby without a the cure-all-crying-be-gone “tat”?!?!?!)

*This just in: Full-blown fever, chills and other flu-like symptoms: Harley.

Now for some I’m sorrys.

Apologies to my friend, Katie: I didn’t take your two children Friday night for six hours while you went to the temple. I just couldn’t do it. Sorry.

Apologies to the Elders: I refused to let Harley go on splits with you the one night he was able to come home early. Sorry.

Apologies to our friend Eric: My house is not usually this messy. And you should know, some days I really do get dressed, put on make up and a bra. Frozen pizza isn't usually doughy in the middle. I can cook a frozen pizza. An ugly, bra-less Diva served you gross pizza in a messy home. Sorry.

Explanation to all you judgers at Costco: I'm sure a woman lugging a 23 month old on one hip and an 8 month old on the other hip, with a 6 month pregnant belly jutting out looks pretty ridiculous. Thanks for staring. You should know: they’re not all mine.

Cheryl and Ryan get back tomorrow. First thing on my To Do list: sleep. We get Lincoln again in April when Cheryl and Ryan go to Mexico for a week. I’m sure it will be much better that time. Everyone will be healthy then. I mean, this can’t all happen, all at once, again right?

Good thing they're both so stinkin' cute. I sure do love these faces.





***UPDATE: Not 30 seconds after I published this post, I heard Harley throwing up. He did not make it to the toilet. On the bright side, no children were awakened (at least, not yet) in this latest lowlight.


Kaija said...

oh sweet wendy. what a series of trials. wow. i can't wait to be a mother :) hang in there. our prayers are with harley in his sickness. you are so good to focus on those wonderful faces -- in the one in profile it looks like they are singing to each other, the blue bottle the microphone!

Codi said...

I just think of when I babysat for Julie last year.. four under four. No one was really difficult on there own, it was just that there were four of them and so someone was always needing something. After that week I told myself that I was going to wait a couple more years to have another baby... didn't know Olive was already conceived.

All I can say is that I hope Cheryl is planning on paying you back big time! You deserve it!

Crystal said...

I babysat a child that was not my own for a week when pregnant with my 2nd as well. And it was a horrible horrible nightmare. I doubted if I would be able to care for my own two children in the few short months that that would soon be happening. It turns out thankfully it was so much easier talking care of two when they were both mine and I was not pregnant. Just to give you some hope. Sorry your week was SO rough.

janaemadsen said...

sorry Harley is sick- Lincoln is SUPER CUTE.
you are a super hero. I hope Harley feels better.

Wein said...

is braxton the name of baby numba two? i like!

Rachel said...

Oh Wendy!!!!! Ahh!!! I can come help you. Call me next time! I don't mind doughy frozen pizza. :)

Holly said...

I'm so sorry!

carter said...

Well, obviously the cocoa pebbles debacle is the most tragic item on your list. I'm still trying to pretend that didn't happen.

I wish I could offer some advice. All I've got: in the future, buy the plastic baby food containers. They still make the glass ones?

@Wein - made me smile.

Ming said...

This post was funny...not so much funny haha as tragically funny, but none the less I love your humor through it. You're a trooper! And yes, Cheryl owes you big time! You're a VERY nice sister, and I know she'd do the same for you. You have a fantastic family like that.
I hope Harley gets feeling better soon and that you don't catch what he has! Love you.

Mom said...

Hardship + Time = Funny.

I chuckeld when I read your blog. I know Cheryl is home and it's all a mommy memory by now. I'll bet you'll do some laughing while sharing it all with her.

I hope Harley recovers quickly.

Joo Lin said...

Love the pictures of the adorable boys! Hats off to you for that crazy adventure! You really are super-mom!

anna banana said...

Awful time! I am so sorry! Having two children of your own will not always be like this! (But unfortunately it will sometimes:) Although I have to say that is a whole lot of stuff in one week. Yikes! Way to survive!

lys said...

Oh my dearest Wendy, you are dealing with too much right now!!! I'm so sorry! I have my fingers crossed that you do not get the dreaded stomach illness. You certainly don't need anymore to deal with right now.

Logical Libby said...

See, here in Utah, no one would have judged. They just would have wondered where the rest were...

Alex and Katie said...

Oh Wendy! I am so sorry. And can I say how much I enjoy your posts? I apparently can say it because I did say it.

Tell Harley I think he's weak sauce. Every King should be able to make it to the toilet. Lame. Super lame. Tell him the same thing he told me EVERY SINGLE STINKIN' TIME I GOT SICK growing up-- Harley, it's all in your head, suck it up.

Kate said...

Oh. my. gosh. Bless your soul. If this isn't preparing you for two kids, I don't know what would!

Oh and you're an amazing sister!

Robyn said...

Oh man! I hope you are all able to sleep and get over everything! You are an amazing supermomma and now you know you'll be able to handle anything your boys throw at you! Good luck!

Ryan and Cheryl Harris said...

Wendy, dearest sister...what a disaster. You are the best sister ever. I'm so sorry your week was so awful....but your post was pretty funny. Thank you so much. Words can't describe my appreciation. Now start planning that Florida trip!

MaryAnn said...

Oh Wendy! I love this post. Not so much in the typical way, but more so the oh-life-is-so-crazy-for-other-people-too sort of way! You helped me take a step back and laugh at how funny and ridiculous life can be even when its so overwhelming. Thanks! ... And I hope things get better for you at least long enough for you to get in some good sleep.

Sarah S said...

ohhhhhh I am laughing so hard. What a horrible week. And Harley, I can honestly say I just got over that awful puking flu and it was AWFUL. Wendy, I hope you are not struck with the same thing.

Your Costco comment at the end totally made me laugh out loud. I can only imagine what people were thinking.

I hope you get LOTS of catch-up sleep soon! I kind of can't believe you're doing this again next month. You are tough!!

Amanda said...

You sure sound like supermom to me! You are so brave and sweet to babysit for a whole week! And I love what your mom said about "hardship + time = funny." What a great perspective.

DAD said...

Hi Wendy ... Love the pix, especially the first one. Thanks for being such a good mom and Aunt to my grandkids.
Love Dad

marti said...

That really sounds horrible! I think pee-pees on the carpet come with boys. I let Andrew shower with me in the mornings & as soon as he gets out the first thing he does is pee. Drives me crazy! Hope next week is much, much better!